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8 Subtle Signs That Suggest Your Marriage May Need Work

Many people wander through marriage oblivious to subtle issues bubbling away under the surface. Individual partners believe the relationship is on the right track, only to suddenly find out one day that it has gone irretrievably wrong.

But what signs are normal and what are indications that you need to intervene immediately? Let’s take a look. 

man hugging sad woman

One-Sided Conversations

One-sided conversations are a possible sign that your relationship is experiencing issues. If only one party engages in conversation and the other is silent, it could indicate problems are afoot. 

The most likely issue is that one partner feels left out emotionally. You can’t engage with the other person because they seem to lack that spark you’d expect in relationships. 

One-sided conversations could also mean that your spouse is simply disinterested in continuing to have an intimate relationship with you. If this happens, you’ll want to find out the problem immediately and solve it. 

Sarcasm

Sarcasm in a relationship is also a sign of significant marital woes. Often it is a thin veil for contempt, a corrosive emotion in any partnership. 

Watch out for sarcasm and confront it immediately if you notice it. Nipping it in the bud early on can help stop it from becoming entrenched and prevent it from spiraling into something more serious. 

Be careful and take time to find out what the underlying issues are. Try to probe your partner to uncover anything they don’t like or doesn’t make sense to them. 

Growing Distant

Growing distant is another sign of a relationship that may indicate your spouse is considering ending the marriage. Your partner could seem a long way away emotionally, even if they are physically proximate, suggesting they want a change or to move on. You might also feel the same way, looking for excuses to spend less time with your partner. 

Couples who divorce often do so because they feel like there is no emotional connection left. Being in a relationship is like going through a series of motions instead of experiencing it in reality. 

If you are physically separated from your partner, it might be worth reading about how mediators work. These professionals can help with communication. Their roles can also help to facilitate the next stage of your life if there isn’t any way back for you and your partner. 

Financial Secrecy

Your marriage might also be on the rocks because of financial secrecy, where one partner hides stuff about money from the other. This type of activity becomes more common if one spouse believes the relationship is coming to an end and doesn’t have a future.

You’ll want to explore financial secrecy with the utmost seriousness. Going behind one partner’s back when it comes to money is one of the surest signs a relationship is on the rocks, even if it seems like nothing is going wrong at the surface level. 

Disregard For Household Responsibilities

You might also notice a change in your partner’s attitude towards chores. If they are less willing to do the housework, it could be a sign that they are not taking the relationship as seriously as they once did. 

These problems can become worse over time. When one partner is thinking about leaving or is involved with another person, they naturally put less effort into maintaining the home or the family environment because they are unwilling to continue it. 

Loss Of Interest In Common Activities

sad couple looking out window

You might also notice your partner losing interest in common activities that you used to enjoy together. For instance, they might stop wanting to go on dates or hikes in nature, even if they had done that regularly before. 

Loss in common activities and more focus on individual pursuits is even more alarming. While the culture says that it is okay for couples to do things separately, there shouldn’t be a sudden change from the start of your relationship. If there is, it could indicate that one partner is no longer interested in pursuing the marriage as a joint project. 

When addressing this issue, try not to confront it. Instead, see it as a fact-finding mission. It could be something innocent, like your partner exploring new activities they think you won’t enjoy. However, it could also be a tactic to find new opportunities outside of the marriage. 

Increased Criticism

You also want to watch out for increased criticism, a common sign of frustration. If your partner starts criticizing you more, it might mean that they are unhappy with the current state of things. 

Solving this problem is tricky because it is not always clear what the underlying problem is. Therefore, you’ll need to put on your curiosity hat and try to figure out what it is. 

You also need to strike a balance between reasonable and unreasonable demands from your partner. Something reasonable might be helping more around the house. However, unreasonable criticisms may relate to things like your appearance or how you handle the kids. 

Lack Of Affection

couple kissing

Lack of affection could be another sign your marriage needs help. When partners give up on emotional intimacy and physical touch, the relationship soon follows. 

Again, you’ll want to try to figure out what’s driving this lack of affection. Sometimes, it is something you aren’t doing right, whereas other times, the blame lays squarely on the shoulders of the other person. 

If facing a situation of lack of affection, try to change your priorities and test putting your partner first. If you are putting in 100% and still not getting anywhere, then it’s time to have a serious talk. However, most of the time, you will discover that your spouse warms to you and that the relationship gets back on track. 

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